Hotels and Owls

Tucson Animal Show September 09

Or, Try Sleeping with an Owl in your Hotel Room

Owls are not meant for hotel rooms. 

The passerby glance at them through the windows and do a double take, hence the need to draw the curtains completely. This makes the already somewhat depressing residence even more so.

Owls wake up at three in the morning. It must be an instinctual thing, so they can glide about and catch rodents and whatnot. In a hotel room, they try to glide, but instead cause quite a racket, and leave a lot of feathers for the maid to clean up.

The owl glared at the side of the large television for over two hours. It wasn’t on. I kept on looking at the side of the tv to see what was so fascinating, but couldn’t. I do believe he was mad because it was not turned on.

I did turn in on, but the only thing playing was “Basketball”…a truly horrific supposed comedy that should have been banned in all theatres. The writers would have been ritually flogged, tarred, and feathered as they were ridden out on the rails of the god damned trains that came past the hotel every 20 minutes or so, hooting much louder than the owl, but causing him to respond.

I felt sorry for the people next to me.

In another room, just to clear things up. Hey, my wife reads this now and again.

BANG !  BANG!  Yep , that is your owl at 3:20 telling you that it is now time to try to fly to some other hotel room that may be more comfortable, or perhaps hit the Jacuzzi which unfortunately has already been closed at ten p.m.  You try explaining this to a four year old owl.

I dare you.