Stop Look Listen. And You Will Learn German

Growing up in Minnesota, derived from Danes, of course we were subject to a number of foreign languages. English, French, and German. Swedish didn’t count.

There is no more insulting thing ( I actually did spell it “ting” at first) that you can accuse a Dane of than being Swedish.  Why? Oh hell, I don’t know. Someone back in the early A.D.’s got their panties in a wad and since Sweden looks like a flaccid penis, I guess it some sort of an insult.

Personally, I like Swedes. Especially the women who like to travel to our fair arid state and do “explorative” hikes. Their cheerfulness and ‘happy go lucky’ attitude seems to me to be a great way to gather information about the rest of the globe. Lots and lots.

Anyway, back to the Deutsch. 

Learning German was something that every kid in Minnesota was expected to do in the 70’s. I do not know if that is true now. I had a great teacher, who’s name I can not recall right now,  that was very passionate about the subject.  To this day, I typically talk to my brothers, all four of them, in a sort of slang Germanic…you see, they had the same teacher. We frequently talk, and it usually begins with a horrible stream of gutter Germanic , though my second oldest brother seems to have a very firm grasp on the teachings of  that lady, and will correct you soundly for a mis-spoken phrase.

A good friend of mine came up with a marbled language, that being “sperman”…part Spanish, part german.  I tell you, it works wonders to confuse the hell out of any porter in south America.  We had grown tired on the “no English” ting, and we decided to fight fire with fire. Hell, if they don’t understand us, then we will not understand them either !  Why I didn’t get elected as G Dub’s viceroy is beyond me.

I could have set world affairs back by decades.